The Judgmental Mom

UnknownWorking mom vs. stay-at-home-mom? I don’t care. Each family is unique, and there are so many different circumstances to consider.

Breastfeed vs. bottle feed? Hey, to each their own.

Sleep-train or co-sleep? Whatever floats your boat, sister.

In short, I pride myself on embracing diversity and respecting other’s parenting choices. I simply need to find what works for my little people, my husband and me. Are my kids healthy, happy and growing into respectful, kind individuals? Does my family feel safe and loved? Do they have time to create and explore? Are we learning and working hard and finding our passions?

On most days, I say “YES!” All is good.

I’m a working mom. I said yes to vaccinations and private preschool and after-school sports. I can go on and one with the labels.

And if you’re a mom who elects to do things totally different, that’s cool. No judgment.

But I’ll tell you when my non-judgmental ways fly out the window – when your parenting choices start to impact my own kids in a negative way.

Let me explain.

I’m a mom to three young kids. My eldest is in fourth grade – that ideal stage where he can make his own lunch, read a book solo and get excited about the Tooth Fairy. His personality is forming, but he is also innocent. He wants to play outside, watch superhero flicks and dream about being a professional athlete when he grows up.

So here is where I go crazy, where I am ready to wag my finger in some mom’s face and judge until I’m blue.

Why is your son playing ultra-mature, ultra-violent video games? Why are you allowing him to watch endless YouTube videos? WTH!

Do you know your son marches onto the playground at school and exposes other children to these topics? Sex. Violence. Bad language. In elementary school!

Now your parenting choices are affecting my kids. You are corrupting their innocence. Your lack of parenting just straight up sucks.

So call me a judgmental mom. This behavior is unacceptable. You are doing a disservice to your kid and mine. Your kid may ask to play these games or surf the web without restrictions, but we need to set boundaries. We need to protect our children from content that is simply, undoubtedly inappropriate.

Stand up and be a parent, and maybe then I’ll stop judging you. Seriously (and I’m totally rolling my eyes right now!).

Comments

  1. Angie Pearson says

    AMEN sista!!! I’m right behind ya on this one! I don’t get it! We play E for everyone, I still check commonsensemedia.org before letting my oldest see a pg13 movie (and she’s turning 14 this week!) and, when I answer a birds and bees question, I remind them that this is between us and not for them to try to explain to other kids…other parents might think I’m saying too much, some might think I didn’t explain enough, and we should all get to do it our own way with our kids! Drives me crazy too! With so much in store for them…and with soooooo many years of adulthood ahead of them, what’s a few more years of innocence?!?!

  2. says

    HERE HERE!!!! I’m with ya, girl!!! I have a 5.5 year old daughter who is in Kindergarten. It’s kind of shocking what they pick up at such an early age! I’m not a prude but jeezum!

  3. says

    I am so with you! Yep – why is that 7 year old playing GTA or whatever it’s called and kicking virtual old ladies into the gutter? I can tell you now, there’s a reason that kid is not invited to my house after school – and it wasn’t just about the time they spat their gum out onto my carpet and refused to pick it up!

  4. mp says

    Well, I have to say fourth grade is really quite old to be innocent about sex. All my kids knew about that as a normal and healthy part of life much earlier. And as far as I’m concerned there’s no reason to ask them to “keep the subject a secret” because that would create an atmosphere of shame around it. I’m prepared to defend my position if any mom ever questions me about it. But I do agree watching violence and becoming desensitized to it at very young ages is a problem. My son would get nightmares from scary movies for one thing. And of course, many video games glorify crime, war, torture, and espouse misogyny, so I believe those should be off-limits until the teen years. Do explain why you place those limits however! My son is now a teenager and we still talk about any questionable content in music and games and while I can no longer prevent him from playing these games or watching certain movies, he knows our values and he’s developing a good sense of his own, which is all we can plan for. Since you can’t control the world around you, you need to be able to communicate openly and honestly about any topic with your children.

    • says

      I totally agree about talking openly with my kids about sex, and I want them to feel like they can come to me with any question. I don’t want it to be taboo. However, one of these video games in question is really portraying sex in a way that is inappropriate for four young children – touching on subjects like prostitution, stripping, etc. Frankly, I would not approve of anyone in my house playing games of this nature. I find it offensive. My kids are not in a bubble, and I recognize I will not be able to control all of the outside influences. In fourth grade though, I don’t think I’d tell my son it’s OK to share everything he knows with other classmates.

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